Monday, April 30, 2012

Stiletto Heels and Pigeon-toes



April 28, 2012

Blog, interrupted. It’s been a long time since I wrote anything. Decisions have been made. We are now thinking of renting out our house and guest house instead of selling the property. I have started a new career as a counselor/therapist . (Not entirely new --- I’ve done it on and off for years.) Rod’s chemo finished a couple of months ago. It was very tricky, very hard on his body and we are still waiting for his blood chemistry to recover. But at least it’s over.

A sign of my emotional recovery is that I’m beginning to think about silly things again. For instance, if you’ve seen Jennifer Hudson’s ad for WeightWatchers, have you noticed the stance of this beautiful, confident, successful woman?  Because the ad shows her new body from top to bottom, the legs and feet are very prominent. It struck me as strange that she should choose to stand pigeon-toed, in a deliberately awkward manner.

In fact, if you thumb through any fashion magazine, the super-thin models, when looking fashionably sexy, all have that same pose, looking slightly pigeon-toed. This seems to be the “look” today, and I realize that I too, when self-consciously posing for a photo, unconsciously turn my toes inward.

This made me think of my mother’s generation. In every photo of that era, the women, if seated, hold their ankles lightly crossed with their knees firmly together. Or the legs are slightly slanted, together and perfectly parallel. If they are standing, they have one foot behind the other, and the front foot turns slightly outward, as if they had studied ballet. Very fetching, even if a bit stilted to the modern eye.

So what does it all mean? The inward look is no more natural than the outward one. Both look self-conscious. Both are sending a message. The outward look is easy --- it says I am a proper lady. I am well-bred. I am cultured and have studied the graceful arts. I confess I’m old enough to have posed in that manner myself, and old enough to have been judgmental of women in photos whose knees were apart while their ankles were crossed. They were suspected of being loose.

But the inward look? When did it start? And why? My first guess at the message conveyed by this body language is this:  I may be drop-dead gorgeous, I may appear super-cofident and strong, but underneath I am vulnerable. At heart I am just a little girl.  Yes, that is the way little girls stand. So, my guess is that the style-conscious modern woman is unconsciously undercutting her power so as to be more approachable, to make herself less threatening. To test this hypothesis, can anyone imagine Hillary Clinton or Angela Merkel standing pigeon-toed while addressing the nation? Perhaps at a cocktail party when chatting with someone she finds attractive.

Not only vulnerable, the stance is also a defensive one. You place your foot like that when you’re trying to ward off a ball rolling straight at you. A feminist could have a hay day analyzing the meaning behind this body language. There are two things a woman is bombarded with every day. One: the critical eye of other women. Two: the ever-present "male gaze". In the light of this, the pigeon-toed little girl stance is brilliant. To women it says, Don't judge me; I'm not a threat. Let's have coffee. To men it says: I may make more money than you, but at heart I'm just the shy girl next door to you. Let's have fun.

There is, of course, a simpler explanation for the modern posture. In stiletto heels, it just might be more stabilizing, more comfortable. Whatever. It's good to have my silly thoughts back.