April 28,
2012
Blog,
interrupted. It’s been a long time since I wrote anything. Decisions have been
made. We are now thinking of renting out our house and guest house instead of
selling the property. I have started a new career as a counselor/therapist .
(Not entirely new --- I’ve done it on and off for years.) Rod’s chemo finished
a couple of months ago. It was very tricky, very hard on his body and we are
still waiting for his blood chemistry to recover. But at least it’s over.
A sign of my
emotional recovery is that I’m beginning to think about silly things again. For
instance, if you’ve seen Jennifer Hudson’s ad for WeightWatchers, have you
noticed the stance of this beautiful, confident, successful woman? Because the ad shows her new body from
top to bottom, the legs and feet are very prominent. It struck me as strange that she should choose to stand pigeon-toed, in a deliberately awkward manner.
In fact, if
you thumb through any fashion magazine, the super-thin models, when looking
fashionably sexy, all have that same pose, looking slightly pigeon-toed. This
seems to be the “look” today, and I realize that I too, when self-consciously
posing for a photo, unconsciously turn my toes inward.
This made me
think of my mother’s generation. In every photo of that era, the women, if
seated, hold their ankles lightly crossed with their knees firmly together. Or
the legs are slightly slanted, together and perfectly parallel. If they are
standing, they have one foot behind the other, and the front foot turns
slightly outward, as if they had studied ballet. Very fetching, even if a bit
stilted to the modern eye.
So what does
it all mean? The inward look is no more natural than the outward one. Both look
self-conscious. Both are sending a message. The outward look is easy --- it
says I am a proper lady. I am well-bred. I am cultured and have studied the graceful arts. I confess I’m old enough to have posed in that manner myself,
and old enough to have been judgmental of women in photos whose knees were
apart while their ankles were crossed. They were suspected of being loose.
But the
inward look? When did it start? And why? My first guess at the message conveyed
by this body language is this: I may be drop-dead gorgeous, I may appear super-cofident and strong,
but underneath I am vulnerable. At heart I am just a little girl. Yes, that is the way little girls
stand. So, my guess is that the style-conscious modern woman is unconsciously
undercutting her power so as to be more approachable, to make herself less threatening. To test this hypothesis, can anyone imagine Hillary Clinton or Angela Merkel standing pigeon-toed while addressing the nation? Perhaps at a cocktail party when chatting with someone she finds attractive.
Not only
vulnerable, the stance is also a defensive one. You place your foot like
that when you’re trying to ward off a ball rolling straight at you. A feminist
could have a hay day analyzing the meaning behind this body language. There are two things a woman is bombarded with every day. One: the critical eye of other women. Two: the ever-present "male gaze". In the light of this, the pigeon-toed little girl stance is brilliant. To women it says, Don't judge me; I'm not a threat. Let's have coffee. To men it says: I may make more money than you, but at heart I'm just the shy girl next door to you. Let's have fun.
There is, of course, a simpler explanation for the modern posture. In stiletto heels, it just might be more stabilizing, more comfortable. Whatever. It's good to have my silly thoughts back.
